“Is masturbation a sin?”
I intentionally did not address this question when I wrote my book for men on sexual purity. My reason was not from fear of talking about controversial or sensitive subjects, it was because I didn’t want those who disagree to tune me and the rest of my message out. I thought it would be an unnecessary distraction. Because whenever you talk about masturbation, no matter your stance, people will disagree.
After counseling men through over a dozen online small groups and fielding many questions via email from blog readers and podcast listeners, can you guess what I get asked most often?
“Is masturbation a sin?”
So it’s time to give my best effort at an answer to this question. Before I do, I want to lay down some ground rules. I am answering this question out of need in hopes of helping those who ask me, not because I’m on a crusade for this stance. I answer it humbly. I answer it in full respect to the stances that would disagree with mine. I also answer it pragmatically, as a practitioner helping guys in the real-life daily grit and grind of their private lives, not from an ivory tower of academia or ivory pulpit of pastoral preaching, nor for any delight in online theoretical arguing and debating.
One more preface before I jump in: I answer this as a man who counsels men in these sensitive, vulnerable subjects, knowing full well that women struggle with masturbation as well. I by no means am assuming to be an expert on women’s masturbation tendencies, though I do believe the biblical argument I make will have application across gender differences. I trust that female readers can use discernment in applying what is directly applicable to them and to show grace to me for the parts of their wiring and struggle that I am uninformed on. I welcome female readers in to benefit from this article, with the disclaimer that my experience is as a male and in talking about masturbation habits among males.
What do others say about masturbation?
It’s helpful to begin this conversation by showing that faithful Christians disagree on this subject.
The classic view on masturbation in the conservative evangelical church is that it is always a sin. I don’t feel it’s necessary to quote names behind this view, because it feels like the predominant view in the circles I run in, and it’s not my intent to call anyone out here. I also know many individual men who I counsel who hold this view, as well as many close friends of mine. I have a ton of respect for this view.
I also think those who hold this view often don’t know that there are others out there who hold a different view. I know that used to be the case for me. I held this view and was pretty passionate about it. The sexual purity books I read in college backed up this view and I was committed to it. I remember the first time I heard a differing view from this one: I was in college and heard a youth pastor teaching his middle schoolers about masturbation and telling them it was not a sin and even gave instruction about what it was (with the teens’ parents present). I was in shock and adamantly disappointed.
I once taught a teen how I stopped the habit of masturbating and gave him instruction on how to quit like I did. How to reframe the thoughts and urges that tempted him. He then told his dad what I taught him and his dad was very upset with me. His dad was a brilliant doctor, as well as a faithful, biblically conservative, follower of Jesus. His dad told me that masturbation was a natural part of development for the male body and was God’s way of giving a man sexual release who isn’t married. He told me what I taught his son (and other young men) was heaping an incredible amount of unneeded shame on them–telling them something was a sin that God has designed their bodies to naturally do.
In his book Preparing for Adolescence – Straight Talk to Teens and Parents, biblically conservative poster boy Dr. James Dobson says:
It is my opinion that masturbation is not much of an issue with God. It’s a normal part of adolescence which involves no one else. It does not cause diseases, it does not produce babies, and Jesus does not mention it in the Bible. I’m not telling you to masturbate, and I hope you won’t feel the need for it. But if you do, it is my opinion that you should not struggle with guilt over it.
Why do I tell you this? Because I deal with so many Christian young people who are torn apart with guilt over masturbation; they want to stop and just can’t. I would like to help you avoid that agony.
In Helping the Struggling Adolescent, Les Parrott III writes:
In a life stage that is typically fraught with insecurity, anxiety, and turmoil, the search for the pleasures of masturbation may become compulsive. When this occurs, compulsiveness, not masturbation is the problem that needs to be addressed. Teens need not be obsessed with or mastered by masturbation. (p.247)
And for a view talking to male and female adults, rather than teens, here is Christian psychologist and marriage counselor Dr. Kevin Leman, from his popular book Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage:
Some of my readers might be getting red in the face right now, thinking, ‘Dr. Leman, are you asking me to masturbate?’
Sometimes I hate that word, simply because of the connotations that have become associated with it. When husbands or wives stimulate themselves to climax to avoid intimacy with their spouse or to participate in pornography or something like that, they are, in my view, acting in a selfish and destructive manner. However, when a wife is learning to respond sexually to her husband so that the two of them can enjoy a deeper and richer sexual experience, she is working toward greater intimacy, not less–just like a husband who is trying to learn ejaculatory control or who is on a long business trip may occasionally use self-stimulation to strengthen his marriage rather than weaken it. (p. 97)
I give these examples not to argue for or against them, or to give testimony for my view. I give them to show there is a diversity amongst faithful Christians when it comes to the topic of masturbation, particularly for those who have never realized such diversity exists. Whatever your view on masturbation, this diversity helps us approach the subject humbly and respectfully.
What does the Bible say about masturbation?
A primary goal of mine with a question about masturbation is to not add anything to the Bible and to not remove/ignore anything in the Bible, no matter what we may or may not have been taught in church up to this point. Let’s briefly look at what the Bible does and doesn’t say about masturbation and how masturbation is and isn’t related to lust and pornography:
- The Bible never mentions masturbation. I wish it did, but it doesn’t.
- Some fun facts about the Bible and masturbation: when Onan spilled his semen on the ground in Genesis 38:9-10, it had nothing to do with masturbation, as you will hear erroneously taught on occasion. Onan was bound by law to entering into a levirate marriage with his brother’s widow, and he refused to fulfill this duty.
- Leviticus 15:1-18 alludes to male masturbation, or at the very least to nocturnal emissions. It gives cleanliness instructions that are consistent with other non-sinful hygiene laws like women’s periods or intercourse between married couples. My point here is that if masturbation is what this text is referring to, it does not do so by condemning it as sin, but as treating it as a biological function of the human body. I’m not arguing it is referring to masturbation, but I don’t think it can be argued conclusively that it is not. It seems that masturbation would be included within the umbrella of this instruction.
- The Bible does tell us lust is a sin. See Proverbs 6:25, Matthew 5:27-28, among others. Lust simply means to long for or desire and can be applied to non-sexual things as well. In these passages, this longing and desire is sexually applied to a man or woman’s body who is not your spouse.
- So at this point, we can confidently conclude that when masturbation involves lust, the Bible says it is a sin. As masturbation and pornography often go together, it is easy to see how masturbation gets labeled a sin in the same way pornography does.
But can you masturbate without lusting? And if you can, would it be a sin? At this point, weighing what Scripture says and doesn’t say, we can conclude that if you can masturbate without lusting, then it is not a sin.
But this is not nearly the end of the conversation. At this point, we are simply laying out what Scripture says and doesn’t say, and being honest about it.
If you can masturbate without lusting, it is not a sin.
It’s black and white that pornography is lust, thus masturbation associated with porn is sinful. But what about masturbation without porn involved? Things are about to get murky.
If you are masturbating while thinking of pornographic images, you are lusting and thus in sin. If you are masturbating while thinking lustful (sexually desirable) thoughts about a woman from real life, you are lusting and sinning. This would fit directly into the thoughts Jesus is talking about in Matthew 5:27-28.
If you are masturbating as a physical-act-only without thinking about another person, you aren’t sinning. (This does not mean this is a good idea or recommended, which we’ll get to in a moment).
If you are masturbating while thinking about your spouse, an argument could be made that this is not lusting or sinning. See Dr. Kevin Leman’s quote above.
Shame
I had a married guy I was counseling confess to me that he was masturbating. He was an absolute wreck about his perceived failing as he sobbed in shame. He told me that masturbating was the same as sleeping with another woman and he couldn’t face the shame that he had cheated on his wife.
Masturbation is not the same as sleeping with another woman. This man had not cheated on his wife.
Let me repeat that: masturbation is not the same as sleeping with another woman.
I would never call masturbation good, but I will say loud and clear is it better than sleeping with another woman and would question anyone who disagrees.
It is also better than looking at pornography.
I know of some who have used it temporarily (without pornography) to wean their body off of the habit of porn addiction.
I’m not advocating for masturbation, but I am saying we need to stop heaping this type of unbiblical shame on it. And while better, longterm solutions are optimal and should be sought for, if masturbation is keeping you from pornography or having sex outside of marriage (either premarital or extramarital), then it is helping you more than it is hurting you.
Maintenance Masturbation
I was counseling a divorced, single guy who just could not stop masturbating and he was really down on himself up for it. He had gone through multiple rounds of my beyondthebattle.net groups with me and had made huge strides in his overall sexual purity, with tons to be celebrated, but masturbation would just not leave him. In fact, he’d be capable of physically restraining himself from masturbating, but his mind and body, generally speaking, would literally just go crazy, in constant torment. Not spiritual or lustful torment, but physiological, body chemical torment (that I’m sure someone way smarter than me could explain scientifically). He found he’d have to masturbate to give his body the physical release it was seeking, then his brain and body chemicals would go back into normal balance. I counseled him to call this “maintenance masturbation.” He was not thinking of lustful thoughts and was not longing to masturbate, meditating on it, feeding it with images, or looking forward to it. But it kept him sane. This can be the best option for some people. If you have a better option, let me know and I will pass it along to my friend. Sometimes we have to simply give the best option available, with no perfect option presenting itself, which is often what happens when we get away from blog banter and into the grit of real life.
I should also note that not every man’s body is the same and while this man’s seemed to need this release, not all do. I know many single men who successfully live without masturbating to no detriment to their mind or body.
With this said about the man I counseled, there are many ways that any controlled approach to masturbation can easily get out of control and put you back into the black and white “sin” category. It’s easy to say you won’t think of lustful images, but then to do so on autopilot. These lustful thoughts can also lead you back to a prior connection between masturbation and porn or other stimulating images, giving you an appetite to seek those things out. Masturbation can also become addictive, where it stops being something that is periodic maintenance and becomes something automatic or that you are dependent on. While you’ll find some like Dr. Leman who give concessions for masturbation within marriage, this is especially dangerous ground as masturbation can easily become a substitute for taking the effort to pursue your spouse, even if done with the best intentions.
I have several friends and men I’ve counseled who are dead set against masturbation. For them there is no delineation from masturbation and its accompanying lustful thoughts. For them, as soon as they make a compromise with masturbation, they inevitable get sucked in to the exact dangers I mentioned above. I fully respect this and support these men in holding them accountable to end masturbation as a habit in their lives. For those able to eliminate masturbation from their lives, this is the best option by far.
But does this mean masturbation should be avoided at all costs by everyone in every circumstance?
No, I don’t think so.
Does this mean masturbation should be celebrated and encouraged?
No, I don’t think so.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, you have to be fully transparent and honest before God about your heart and your intentions when it comes to masturbation. You have to know if you are deceiving yourself and masturbation is leading you into sin or if it is truly something that is keeping you from sin. You need to talk to God and listen to what he says.
I am not a prophet. Take my voice as one voice out there. Read books. Talk to accountability partners. Talk to a mentor. Talk to your pastor. Talk to your doctor. Talk to your spouse. Talk to a marriage counselor. Discern with the Holy Spirit. One of the reasons I haven’t wanted to write on this subject is that I don’t want to lead anyone into sin. I take that very seriously. But the reason I am writing on it now is because my silence on it, and the assumption by many that it’s always wrong all the time, has led them into the unnecessary shame of legalism. And for some, its absence has led to the much greater sins of pornography and pre or extramarital sex. And then there’s others who are trying everything they can to stop, literally going crazy, that I hope this brings some peace to.
If you have helpful tips, strategies, or thoughts to make this article better, please add them in the comments below. There is an option to write anonymously if you choose.
He is:
Author of Beyond the Battle: A man's guide to his identity in Christ in an oversexualized world
Host of the The Flip Side Podcast
Join an online men's small group led by Noah and team at BeyondTheBattle.net
- Ep. 107: Mark & Beth Denison on Betrayal Trauma - November 4, 2024
- When “I follow the Lamb, not the Donkey or the Elephant” falls short - October 31, 2024
- Why We Can’t Merge Jesus With Our Political Party - October 24, 2024
1 Timothy 4:1-5 seem to be relevant as well. Thanks for your article.
A good discussion. I like how it is somewhat open and not definetive. Something to think about and bring before the Lord. Thank you. Quite good.
Is masturbation a sin… probably not. I think most people will find it extremely hard to masturbate without sinning though. I think this is especially true if they regularly used porn and masturbation in tandem. Lustful images have been trained to flood the brain in correlation to the habit. To me it would be easier to stop masturbating then to learn to masturbate without sinning.
Thanks for writing about this! It’s one of those things helped alot just by more openness; shame becomes a weight on things we can’t talk about, and that can take on a life of its own. I like your take that as an action without lust it’s not sin. I think there’s also something to be said for the difference between satisfaction as release from tension, and the pleasures from lust. If I’m at the game and there’s a line to get to the urinal, it’s not sin that I finally get to go. Viewed purely as a bodily function, I look at it like eating, it can be necessary and not sinful, but overeating and eating the wrong thing are both unhealthy. But it’s rarely experienced as merely function, is it?
There’s other ways it involves sin apart from lust. As a Christian dealing with not being attracted to women, I would find identity as a guy in being aroused apart from any release. It’s a really shallow way of looking at being a guy and doesn’t have anything to do with being a man, and that was the sin of it, not so much it being right or wrong, but missing the truth that my identity is in Christ and being the guy He’s leading me to be. It does come down to what you wrote, having a pure heart before God, and your post helps to clear away what’s false that weighs down with guilt and shame but do nothing to help you toward a pure heart.
Female reader here…I appreciated your insight, yet I feel like there is a paragraph missing to your article…”Masturbation in Marriage”. Is that still okay? What if the wife doesn’t want her husband to masturbate but he does anyway?
My husband takes it upon himself several times a week to achieve this release you speak of. He claims he needs it for stress relief. But, what I am finding is that this takes away his desire for me. He ends up initiating sex once every 2 to 4 weeks, and I am ready and willing most days. It’s endlessly frustrating, not to mention it puts me in the same position of guilt you speak of because I find myself wanting to masturbate due to his lack of interest in me and the build up of sexual tension within my own body.
Thanks for the comment and deep question Elizabeth. The more typical marriage masturbation that I’ve counseled is guys whose wives are not available to them sexually, so they feel forced to masturbate, not as stress relief, but as that sexual tension relief, which I mention in the article. In these cases, they are thinking about their wife and only masturbating because they have to, where their real desire is to be with their wife sexually. But your situation is different. This is what Dr. Kevin Leman speaks against in the quote I shared, when masturbation takes a person AWAY from their spouse, it is always wrong. If you are available to your husband sexually, there’s no reason he should be masturbating and he is definitely in sin. I don’t know your husband or his faith in Christ and how that may or may not play a role. But he needs to stop masturbating and pursue you. I would be happy to talk with him in private if this was something he was desiring to grow in and walk through. He could reach me on my contact form in my menu, which goes straight to my personal inbox. I would also recommend marriage counseling where you could both talk openly about this.
Noah,
Your response and offer of help is much appreciated. I hope to communicate all this to my husband. It would be wonderful if he reached out to you for healing.
Elizabeth
I studied out this topic as a single and came to a similar conclusion, that masturbation is not a sin when it is divorced from lust. Consequently, I allowed myself to indulge in it for some time. I learned several things through that experiment.
1. For myself, even if masturbation was not explicitly concurrent with lust, it was a gateway drug that encouraged me to utilize more porn on the side.
2. The orgasm is designed to let spouses connect and bond. When the orgasm is experienced in isolation, this allows one to bond only with themselves (hat-tip to Beyond the Battle videos 2 and 4). I discovered that I didn’t desire romantic or platonic relationships because I felt self-sufficient and satisfied.
Because of these realizations I decided that I can’t pursue personal wholeness and sanctification while allowing unbridled hedonism in the form of masturbation.
I think I posted something similar at https://www.noahfilipiak.com/parenting-advice-how-to-raise-boys-in-this-oversexualized-world/#comment-7611
Great thoughts, thanks Kenneth!
So, Noah, where do you fall on this spectrum of masturbation? Are you open with your wife about it and have come to an agreement? Do you hide or keep secrets from your wife? What about lusting? Isn’t it almost always impossible not to allow lust and fantasy to creep into your mind while masturbating? You also mention masturbating to thoughts of your wife is not a sin. This is absolutely not true. You are putting your wife in your fantasy to masturbate in which she has no control or consent. You are manipulating her in your own thoughts to do whatever it is that gets you through masturbating. You are using your wife for your own pleasure without including her in the most sacred gift God gives couples to share only with each other. Last thought for now, your recommendation of “maintenance masturbation” is absurd. The more one masturbates, the more the brain is conditioned to the dopamine rush just like a drug. That man you counseled is addicted to masturbation because of the scientifically proved physiological response of the chemicals released in his brain. Please Noah, if you believe so much in your blog post, will you please be transparent with your audience and let us know what part masturbation plays within your life and marriage?
Hi Gina, it’s unfortunate you asked your questions in such an attacking way. I can tell this topic is an area of pain for you and I want to show you grace in it. I have private accountability partners and a private marriage counselor for my wife and I, and those are the places I talk about those things, not in my public blog. I think you are assuming a lot though, both about me personally (which is offensive) and about my view and heart here. I also did not say that masturbating to thoughts of your wife wasn’t a sin, I said that Dr. Kevin Leman said that in his book Sheet Music, to show there are a variety of views out there amongst Christian leaders and Christian marriage and sex therapists. I am not advocating for masturbation. I agree that a person shouldn’t become addicted to the dopamine hit of masturbation and that frequent / uncontrolled masturbation requires immediate intervention. I think I was pretty clear on that in my article. We are in agreement there. The man I counseled was not addicted to masturbation. He was just a single man, divorced actually so had a lot of previous sexual experience, and his body still has a high sex drive. Having a sex drive is not an addiction. He was masturbating maybe 1-2x a month. To me an addiction is 1-2x a day. To conclude, I don’t “believe so much in my blog post” as you state. There’s so much gray area here, but we need honest conversations to help men and women get out of shame and into grace, while still seeking the help that they need. I hope you’ll reconsider your tone and if so, I’d be happy to dialogue further with you.
Thank you for addressing this. There are so many articles that have been written about the evil of pornography, and rightfully so, but much much less about masturbation without pornography. Speaking from a male perspective, I think the fundamental question is “does a man have a biological need to ejaculate?” I have never seen this addressed in a meaningful way in any forum. I have seen people make statements like “men need to release sperm because they are constantly producing it,” but this is seemingly false. Men who have had a vasectomy never “release” sperm again, despite continuing to produce it. I don’t mean to make fun of anyone, but my point is that people make comments like that who don’t even understand a basic biological concept like sperm vs. semen production.
People will make general statements like, “your sex drive is meant to push you to pursue your spouse,” or “sex is supposed to be about giving of yourself,” or “masturbation is selfish because it only involves you,”- while all of these are (in my opinion) largely true, none of them address the fact that, for a non-married man, many could interpret traditional Christian teaching to say that he is NEVER supposed to ejaculate (aside from that which might occur involuntarily while sleeping). Is this a reasonable expectation? Maybe no one tries to answer this question because there is no clear answer. The implications, though, are significant, and it would be helpful to see more discussion related to the biology surrounding the topic.
Hi Kyle, thanks for the reflection. I haven’t done any deep research on the biological side, but from the little I’ve seen it looks like you can find arguments on both sides. Some who say it’s healthy biologically to masturbate / have that release, then there are others who say no it’s just fine / healthy if you never masturbate / have that release. That’s always confusing and sadly is how a lot of our culture argues these days, by selecting the research that they like. I do find it helpful to talk to Christians in the medical field. Sorry I can’t be more of help. I appreciate the questions you raise.
Hello Noah,
I truly appreciate your willingness and openness to talk about a serious subject matter. I’ll try to keep it brief. I’m a 60 year old single Christian man. I struggled with homosexuality all my life, however married at 22 to prove to God, myself, my parents/siblings and friends that I wasn’t a queer. The struggles did not go away. Although my wife and I were both virgins on our wedding night…. I ended up hurting her. And after 10 years of masturbating (I started when I was 12) it was quite different from sex not to mention I was still not really attracted to the female body. Fast forward almost 8 years into our marriage and I was propositioned by another man. I always said I’d never go looking for homosexual sex. But it found me and I was shocked at how easy it was to give into it. I fought for the next two years and an ex-gay support group and finally gave up and separated from my wife. I lived the next 25 years as a “gay Christian”… I was quite unhappy in both aspects (gay and Christian). Well 3 1/2 years ago the Lord pursued me with a force on night as I lay in bed and He was telling me that I would never have that peace that passes all understanding until I surrender ALL of my life to Him (including my homosexuality)… I have not “fallen” in all this time. However, I still don’t find women sexually attractive, and I do find men sexually attractive. But I don’t struggle anymore with lust for men or acting out with them. I did with porn for a while even after giving my life back to God.
However, masturbation used to be quite a compulsion/addiction. I can say I have a huge biological urge to release and as you mentioned the majority say masturbation is a SIN, PERIOD!
I can honestly say, when I masturbate I’m NEVER thinking of having sex with another man or lusting after another man. I do watch myself masturbate, but I can’t say it turns me on. It just seems weird to look away. But when I try and do the abstinence is when I go crazy and think about porn or lust… if I just give into masturbating when “biologically” necessary it seems to keep any sinful urges away.
I hate that my whole life I have felt like no matter how much I feel like I’m growing in my relationsihp with Christ it is negated by the fact that I’m a masturbator and bound for hell.
I like what you said about praying and asking the Holy Spirit to direct me. I will do that as I’m sleepy and ready to call it a night. I’m going to try and not give in as a sleeping aid and rather talk with the Lord about the topic. I pray for discernment as I seem to lack this. I don’t want to get caught up in emotions, but really feel the Holy Spirit speak to me regarding this very controversial topic.
My whole life I’ve felt like I was the worse sinner in the world because of my masturbation addiction. Is that from God, or legalistic Christians? Who knows… But I do appreciate your honesty about this topic and showing both sides.
Thank you for listening to me.
In Christ,
Jim
Hi Jim, thanks so much for your comment. I’ve written a number of articles on same sex attraction / LGBT and some recent podcast interviews that I hope you check out as I think they would encourage you. https://www.noahfilipiak.com/category/blog/homosexuality/
No matter where someone falls on their conviction or stance on masturbation, one thing I can 110% promise you is you are not bound to hell because you masturbate. That is a lie from hell! I say that because it contradicts the gospel of Jesus. Colossians 1:22 tells us: But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation.
When God looks at us, he sees us as holy, without blemish, and free from accusation, because that’s what Jesus bestows upon us when we put our faith in his free grace. This is the freedom of the gospel. I am so thankful for it!
Charles Spurgeon said it so well:
Your acceptance is not in yourself, but in your Lord; you are just as accepted by God today, with all your sinfulness, as you will be when you stand before His throne, free from all corruption. So I urge you, take hold of this precious thought—perfection in Christ! For you are “complete in him.” With your Savior’s garment on, you are as holy as the Holy One.
Hello Noah,
Thank you. As a Christian 23 year old single male, of course this post has given me sort of relief because Ive tried for 5 or 6 years to stop from sleeping on top of my sheets in jeans and full outfits, to sleeping on my knees praying to throwing away pajamas that were loose and seemingly tempted me to masturbate, to being free for almost a month then crying as a teen because I gave in. I just can never fully shake it.
Porn has been out of the question ever since I fasted and I havent really had the desire I once had to watch it (praise God). Even after I fasted, I STILL couldn’t break the act of masturbation without lustful thoughts. I’m still going to be seeking God in this issue, but this article has provided a sort of relief. Lol I really wished the Bible spoke on this issue, but I’m 100% sure God knew many Christians and single Christians would have questions on this topic and I believe if we go to Him genuinely the Holy Spirit will guide us in the right direction.
Thanks again.
& I’m DEFINITELY praying and looking for a wife that I believe God will
bless me with at the right time. I’m just trying to stay focused on what I feel like His purpose for me is right now. Praise God.
Thanks for the honest reflection N, I know it’s helpful to others to hear and I’m thankful that this article can help with some of the unnecessary shame that you’re dealing with. Keep seeking His will!
I’m a young woman who has very little sexual desire. I have never been properly aroused by the thought of another person. For me, lust was never a part of masturbating. It was a physical thing that I actually discovered by accident when I was only about 3 or 4 years old. I didn’t even know what it was until I was maybe 14, when I finally figured out that it was an orgasm. Lustful thoughts are absolutely not associated with my body being aroused.
I started becoming much closer with God a few months ago, and it was around that time that I realized I was masturbating multiple times a day, and my self control over it was very low. I decided to stop, largely because I’d been led to believe that masturbating is a sin. That’s what everyone always says. It didn’t mean that I would stop looking at or thinking about sexual media, because I never did in the first place. I actually find it easier to think of absolutely nothing at all and focus on the mechanics of the action.
I hadn’t masturbated for a few months. I had the physical desire for it sometimes. Like a tiny bit of tension, but I would just push it away. However, lately a lot of stress has been building up in my body, and I recently felt the tension very extremely. I had no lustful desires but the tension was so distracting. So I did the action that causes me to have an orgasm and then I was done.
I feel kind of guilty because I had gone so long without doing it. I had been convinced that it was a sin. But my logical mind tells me that I wasn’t sinning because I wasn’t playing into sexual lust. I had a physical need, and I definitely don’t have a partner to fulfill that need for me. But the fact that I had gone so long without doing it made it feel almost like I was giving up or something. But maybe the fact that I haven’t let out that tension for so long, is why I’ve been having more panic attacks in the past months, and more stress.
I’ve definitely heard studies that say orgasms are healthy for the body. So I think it makes sense that if you are able to have that release without lusting/looking at or think about pornographic media, there’s nothing wrong with it. And the two have never been associated for me. But I do know that I was falling into sin before because I was letting that physical desire control me. I did it when my body wasn’t even asking for it, because I liked the feeling. If you need the physical release and you can achieve it without sinning, then it’s not inherently bad. But you also shouldn’t let the desire for that physical release control your life.